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[Worship] a sense of belonging - Printable Version

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a sense of belonging - Cynix - 06-23-2018






CYNIX
day met night

All his life, he had heard whispers behind his back. Some were waspish and hurried, others were spit in his very face when he was only a small gangly creature of all limbs and awkward angles. Abomination. Heathen. Creature. He'd heard it all as he'd grown and somehow... somehow it had never affected him as it had his twin, Siavax. Their sister would never know what they had endured, being raised in Solterra as she was, oh no. She was lucky, or so Cynix believed, as he hiked up to the peak. For once in his life... he wished for some sort of peace, some sort of validation on his existence. His mother loved him, his father loved him, his family loved him, but the people of the court he was born in to viewed him through skewed eyes and bared their teeth at him from the shadows.

Perhaps Caligo would have an answer for him, or at least some sense of peace.

The amethyst and ivory man had felt the shudders of the world under his hooves, the tremble and groan of the earth, the rocks. He had seen the Summit, but now he trekked elsewhere, to seek out the statue of his ruling deity, of Caligo. She too, had suffered at the whims of those that saw her different, and in his heavy heart, he wanted to know what he could do. He was no deity, he was only a mortal, barely out of being a boy. Young, so very much swayed by hatred aimed at him like barbed hooks, to dig in to his flesh and tear at him.

So as he walked, he finally came to a halt, coral eyes wide and his wings flaring out as his heart leapt up in to his throat. Tears pricked at those eyes, and he shuffled forward on feathered legs, letting out a noise from the back of his throat that was torn and ragged, his body shivering.

There was nothing left of the once proud statue of Caligo. Rubble lay in its place, and he felt his knees buckle a moment, the hope he had held on such fragile strings suddenly sinking as they snapped away. "Oh no.. what have they done...?" His heart ached as he stepped forward, and his head dropped as tears shone in those eyes. "Caligo... where...?" There wasn't much on the ground, flakes and bits of rubble that could have just come from the shakes of the earth, rather than a statue.

All the same, he ached. He ached and felt his insides tighten, his chest grow heavy with the weight of reality. This was... a surprise. He had come for his worship, for an answer perhaps in the form of wordless guidance, but instead there was naught but an indentation where a statue had once stood, proud and sparkling as the night skies over the court that had forsaken him so.

Cynix drew in a shaking breath, blinking stinging eyes as his hooves shifted, and he lowered his head, pressing his nose to where the statue had once stood, a pedestal bare of any deity that had been there. "I came for advice, Caligo... but you are gone. Perhaps I was not meant for this, for anything. I was to be nothing but some abominable child, born between Solterra and Denocte. My parents... they love one another, but... in Denocte. They see me, my brother.. they see us as nothing but unnatural creations. Something that should not be. I wish you were here, Caligo, just to see your face, and perhaps gain peace. I've only lived three years yet I feel as if it's been an eternity. I'm tired, so tired... of feeling like I do not belong."

His voice hitched, and Cynix drew his head up and back, tucking his chin to his chest as the wings behind his ears fluttered and cupped against his skull.

He wanted a home, perhaps a beam of hope. Something. Anything.. to make him feel as if he belonged. Even if his words were spoken to nothing but empty air.



@ || please leave my poor boy be, he just wants to pray in peace for Caligo



RE: a sense of belonging - Random Events - 07-08-2018


resting in diamonds



Caligo was a wild demigoddess - as untamed as the mane of void that whipped around her, as untamed as the sea that licked at the coastline of her Denocte. Even as she left her shrine and descended into the mortal world, she was not bound by the same as her siblings. A child of Tempus was she, but so much more unpredictable..

But in that unpredictability, was the intense love for her people. A rage burned within her heart, set her diamonds ablaze in a fire of shining iridescence. It ached and roiled as her Children experienced the same prejudice the demigoddess herself felt.. cast aside by her siblings. Her Children did not deserve this, not in any respect.

Onyx hooves never touched the ground as she effortlessly glided. Eyes - so dark yet so bright - had looked upon the trees, felt the breeze press against her skin. It was a feeling unlike nothing you could experience, no matter how much knowledge and knowing your omniscience afforded you. It was there that she perched, her form coming to rest upon the ground at the base of a tall, tall elder tree.

The grass kissed her skin, and her muzzle pressed deep within it. She may be angry, filled with rage and wanton vengeance... but at her very core, she was a curious being that only longed for the same acceptance that was afforded of her siblings, even if she knew she would never receive it.

It was then, lost in her thoughts, that the little purple and white boy stepped towards where her statue once stood. Muzzle lifted from the grass, and her still gaze looked towards him as he passed her by without even noticing. Such a curious, sad boy he was - lost in his own world.

Her heart broke all over again, his words gripping it and reducing once solid-stone to crumbled ash. "@Cynix, my child.." she quietly called out to him. She sat beneath the elder tree, her legs elegantly tucked underneath her body yet her mane wild, effortlessly wafting as if gravity had yet to touch it as she descended from the heavens. She looked peaceful.

And if his gaze met hers, she would dip her head down towards the ground beside her. "Come."





RE: a sense of belonging - Cynix - 07-09-2018






CYNIX
day met night

Cynix had been so focused on making it to the statue that he had seen nothing around him, his mind narrowed in and gaze tunneled. So it was a surprise to hear his own name, his hooves scrambling slightly as he turned himself, feathers swaying in the autumn breeze of the mountain air, his head ducking and wings puffing only slightly.

Those eyes shone with tears still, salmon hue meeting her own dark, and he took in a breath of shocked stillness. She... was there. It was actually her, instead of a statue, and he felt as if he'd been struck rather dumb for a moment, his hooves grounded but the rest of him feeling like he was attempting to float off. If it weren't for the anchoring to the ground, he was certain he'd be drifting somewhere.

It took him to get a moment, but he finally got his feathered limbs moving, slowly taking steps closer toward the deity. Cynix felt his breathing slow, and while he was still swamped with his woes, he was entirely entranced by her appearance. By her actual presence, rather than a statue.

"I thought... I thought your statue had been destroyed." The poor boy hiccuped slightly, and finally came to a halt in front of her, his sorrows palpable. He didn't lay with her, still a bit in awe, but he lowered his head as he looked at her, distraught and crumbling before her like a mighty pine to ashes.

Taking a deep breath, he swallowed, watching her and locking eyes with her again. "I am so tired... Caligo. So tired of not belonging anywhere... of being called abominable. Just because of my lineage. Why do they treat me so different, even still? I.. I'm just an innocent in all of this, I didn't ask for it." His words choked and he felt himself shudder as he held back a sob, closing his eyes tight.


@ @inkbone || sdfKLJLDKJSF



RE: a sense of belonging - Random Events - 07-23-2018


resting in diamonds



Her voice surprises him, gentle though it was. He turns quickly, so quickly - and for just a moment, Caligo is afraid his wrath will blind him to her.

His shock is evident upon his face, but the demigoddess is pleased to see the anger heartbreak slowly erase itself from his face. What is left is a child - despite the years, despite the taunts and the mockeries and the shuns, Cynix remains a child that has seen more than his fair share of pain.

She smiles at him, her features gentle and kind. She can feel how tired he is. His pain radiates from him from the crease in his brow to the fatigued arch of his neck, the way life has bent him over forced his carriage continuously lower. In every slow step he takes she can see it, the defeated posture with which he stands.

But her smile is an invitation: of kindness, of belonging, of hope. Cynix is her’s, one of the lost souls that she welcomes without hesitation into her Court, and also into her home.

“The Night cannot be destroyed, dear one,” she tells him, not unkindly. “It may be chased away by the rising sun, but it always comes back by evening. So too will I return with it.”

He lowers his head to her, and Caligo lifts her own. Her dark eyes stare into his, her mane cascaded over her face like a waterfall of shadows. It dances and sways in the wind, constantly in motion, never at rest.

And when he speaks, her heart breaks alongside his.

”Because for every kindness, there seem to be two more wrongs done.” Caligo sighs, her breath a mere whisper on the wind. ”Where there is difference, there is also fear, and the world despises diversity because of it.” 

Caligo stands, pulling herself from the ground to stand beside the painted boy. Not a speck of dirt clings to her coat, nor does a grass stain mar her side despite her time spent beneath the elder tree. 

”But,” she begins, her voice growing stronger. She presses her shoulder into his, leaning into him and bidding him to lean back into her. ”You are beautiful because of your heritage, not in spite of it, and your differences are what make you unique. There is no one in the world that can stand in your place, Cynix. Take your differences and armor yourself within them, so that the world cannot use them to hurt you.”





@cynix