The way every once in a while,
it catches the light and starts smoking.
It did not escape my attention that I stood between two very celestial men. One embodied the sun. It shone from within, illuminating the golden tattoos that ran all along his body like a message I did not know how to interpret. The other wore the stars on his skin. They shimmered gently, seemingly content beneath the colored light reflected off the eventide arch.
I liked to think that, at least on that night, in that company, I embodied the moon. My skin milky blue, knees cratered with scars from all the times I’d fallen down. And I did feel a kindred bond with the queen of night– its delicate form, like my own, betrayed an inner strength that went unseen. In each breath I took I channeled its grace.
And then there was a lion among us– how had I not noticed him sooner?– and for a moment all breath left me. He extended a paw, all regal and kinglike, and with only a heartbeat of hesitation I brushed my muzzle gently across the silken fur. It was the stuff of dreams, remarkably soft, and I met the sun lion’s gaze with an awestruck expression and a comically huge smile. “Hello,” I murmured quietly, a greeting that sat privately between us.
I was honestly a little disappointed to return to the conversation at hand– I could have happily spent the rest of the evening in the lion’s silent company. I think he would have been impressed by how quickly I could stalk through the forest, how I moved like water. Furfur had taught me well, but surely there was even more to be learned from the lion.
It didn’t take Orestes long to recapture my attention– the words dear Aspara turned my stomach over. I did my best to ignore the butterflies. “That doesn’t surprise me.” I grinned. It seemed to me like it would take far worse than Orestes to run Solterra to the ground. “But good. My father would be very upset otherwise.” We had not discussed my father and his ties to the desert, so maybe this comment came out of left field. I didn’t realize this until later that night– often I couldn’t fall asleep, for I was too busy agonizing over the things I said and (worse) didn’t say that day.
Now, this Marisol– I didn’t know her, except in title, but I was instantly intrigued by the protectiveness in Oreste’s voice when he said her name. I admit- I was jealous. I did not need protecting and I surely never thought I wanted it, but– I don’t know– maybe I had been wrong. Maybe it would be nice, to have someone outside my family care for me like that.
But Asterion didn’t mean to leave, right? He didn’t mean to hurt anyone. I found myself biting my lip as my attention returned to the former sovereign. “Did you find him? Your father?” I was overcome by the urge to embrace him, this godfather I had never met. But that’s just the thing– we had never met. And I was sure he didn’t want to be smothered in the embrace of some wild child. But more than that I was afraid he wouldn’t care at all, wouldn’t want to be associated with me even after knowing who my parents were. I did not think I was unlovable. But the possibility of it was there, and it terrified me more than I could express.
I blinked, wide-eyed, overcome with questions. “Where will you go now?” A pause, too brief for the question to be answered. “Are you going to stay in Denocte?” The thought excited me– I would love to see my parents faces when they returned home to an old friend. (Maybe I felt I was not enough to return home to? But this was not a thought I wanted to linger on.)
“And you,” I turned to Orestes with a small but not very serious frown. “What took you so long to visit me?” It felt to me like a lifetime since we first met. Too long. I glanced from one stallion to the other and pictured them here in Denocte, always, close to hand. I was not ashamed to admit that despite how little I knew of each, I deeply liked them both and did not want them to leave.
The way it will cleave and grow
like antlers.
A S P A R A
@Asterion @Orestes <3
