MAXENCE vs AVDOTYA
@Maxence:
Total: 75/100
@Avdotya - Total: 81/100
Total: 75/100
- Attacks 48/65
- Creativity 22/25
First: I like how he uses his wings to try to form some sort of distraction before going straight to his whip! It makes it a little more interesting to read, as there seems to be only so many things he can do with a bullwhip as a weapon. Second: I like how you use a block and an attack in one go! I appreciate that he kicks back rather than just moving out of the way of her hooves - Realism 15/25
First: Because Avdotya was so close, I’m not sure how well he’d be able to use his wings without knocking her in some way or how effective holding a whip between his teeth would be? Though I like that you mentioned how he was holding the whip (between his tushes) instead of using telekinesis or leaving it out entirely! Second: I feel like it would require an incredible amount of precision and perfect timing to achieve what he’s trying to do, but it’s definitely a natural response to kick back at her! - Metrics 11/15
First: A few interesting word choices that kind of caught me off guard (ex: calling her a skeleton) that seemed more for show and didn’t seem to fit as well into the context, but pretty clean grammar and nothing too distracting. Second: A couple strange spelling errors that could have been caught using a quick spellcheck machine or reread, but overall a clear post.
Noteworthy: No battle in the first post, but still a clean entrance. I like how you set the stage for him to be there! Overall I like how much of a feel I can get for Max by reading through his posts.
- Creativity 22/25
- Blocks 27/35
- Creativity 13/15
Again, I really like that instead of simply moving away, he hits back in an actual block rather than just a dodge! - Realism 10/15
I’m not sure he’d really be able to stomp her legs to the ground? He might hit at them, but actually pinning her by her legs would be really tricky just based off of anatomy I think! - Metrics 4/5
Very easy to see what his plan is and more or less to visualize it in my head; didn’t see many errors here!
- Creativity 13/15
@Avdotya - Total: 81/100
- Attacks 53/65
- Creativity 22/25
First: I appreciate that her charge actually meant something and had a clear goal, rather than just running at him and throwing around body weight. Bonus points for attempting to distract him instead of just having at it! Definitely helps dress up a simple charge-attack Second: I like how she uses his attack to start her second attack, rather than taking it and attacking separately. The way she uses his whip and its momentum is pretty creative in my book. - Realism 18/25
First: Simple and effective, particularly realistic in terms of Avdotya herself. This attack, with her weaving around him and trying to distract him and being aware of his whip, definitely seems to play true to her character. Second: I like the bit of damage/jarring she takes during her attack, it definitely helps paint a more realistic picture of what’s going on! However I’m not so sure how well she’d be able to kick with her back leg if she’s unsteady on that front shoulder? Seems like she’d be more likely to faceplant than to really get a solid kick in - Metrics 13/15
First: Not many errors that I found, definitely nothing distracting to take away from the post and its effect. Second: A couple of long sentences that may have been better broken up, but few jarring errors. Super clean and easy to read.
Noteworthy: I love how much you get to know Avdotya in each of the posts—there’s such a good balance between the physical and internal components, it makes it so interesting to read!
- Creativity 22/25
- Blocks 28/35
- Creativity 13/15
I like how she uses her spear to pull herself off the ground, though I’m not entirely sure how she got there after kicking at him to begin with (unless she became a ninja, but knowing Av that isn’t too hard to imagine). Also, was wondering when her magic would come into play! I love that it aided her defensively instead of offensively, it almost makes me think of baby Moana and the water pushing her around lmao - Realism 11/15
I’m not sure how much time she’d have to get her entire body out of the way versus just twisting her legs or something, but I can definitely see her magic helping with that. - Metrics 4/5
I love her clear shift in thinking from offensive to defensive—also a very creative way to definitely end the fight! Grammatically, not many errors or run-ons that I could find, it was really easy to read through overall.
- Creativity 13/15
