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Worship  - [P] hazy shade of winter

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Morrighan
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#11

some women fear the fire
some simply become it


It doesn't surprise her that the monk has met her daughter. Maeve has a way of meeting everyone in the Court it seems. She's quite the social butterfly (she definitely doesn't get that from Morr) and it seems that she can cheer up even the grumpiest of beings. Morrighan can't remember a time when she had been so innocent and actually enjoyed all the wonders of life. Now she has seen and felt too much, there's no going back. She hopes Maeve can hold on to her innocence for as long as she possibly can. Morr doesn't want to see the horrors of the real world blacken the girl's pure soul.

And what Tenebrae says is true, although Morr is a bit taken aback. No one has directly said anything like it before and it makes her feel… different. She's not sad, but actually quite the opposite. "Thank you," she says, her voice much quieter than it has been. Maybe she doesn't want to hear the words echoing along the walls. "She is certainly a special girl. She tells me all the time that she's named you Shadow Man, so you must've made a good impression on her." Morrighan remembers the fall festival and how she carefully crafted Maeve's phoenix costume. It was a way to get her to embrace fire without fearing it. Even though neither of them have seen a phoenix in person, the legends have always described them as beautiful creatures. They didn't have to be dangerous.

When the topic changes to Tenebrae's heartbreak, it brings Morrighan back to where she had been a season ago. She wanted to drown herself- figuratively and literally. She wanted to forget so badly, she tried to do so many destructive things to accomplish that and none of them worked. Who is she to be telling him to forget them anyway?

They have to, or else they'll lose themselves.

"I haven't," she admits, feeling her legs quiver. "But after a while, it was clear that she was not worth my time and energy. She never loved me, so maybe that made it easier at times when I didn't think about how she didn't love me." There's a reason Morrighan has never been a philosopher or ever boasted about giving the best advice. Tenebrae must be desperate if he's trying to get wisdom out of her (but then, isn't that what she's doing- trying to get wisdom out of a monk? The last person she'd ever confide to, until today).

"You just have to find a new purpose for yourself, I guess," she adds, not sounding nearly as confident as she'd like to be. Maybe that's what she's been trying to do with Maeve by trying to prove to Al'Zahra (or perhaps more to herself) that she can be a good mother. It's given her a purpose and one that she can properly focus on. At least there's someone who recognizes it.

"Speaking."
credits


@Tenebrae <3









Played by Offline Obsidian [PM] Posts: 189 — Threads: 28
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Night Court Battlemage
Male [Him/his/he]  |  Immortal [Year 500 Summer]  |  16.3 hh  |  Hth: 37 — Atk: 43 — Exp: 74  |    Active Magic: Shadow-Forging  |    Bonded: Thia (Shadow-creature)
#12


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tenebrae
let everything happen to you, beauty and terror, just keep going, no feeling is final


Morrighan falls quiet with his compliment about her daughter. A shyness stretches like an ill-fitting coat across his Regent’s body. Tenebrae looks away, his eyes falling down to the flagstones at their feet. There is a small smile upon his lips as amusement settles itself into the curve of his mouth. 


He wants to tell her to take joy in his praise. He wants to lament that it is not just shyness that has her quieting, but how she seems, in that moment, so utterly deprived of compliments. The monk would shower her with them if he could. Deliver them constantly until her frustration with them gave way to acceptance. Yet, for all the has heard of Morrighan, he does not think he would survive the experience. The monk would bear the burns of his attempts as scars to remind him how he fought to make her feel valued. It might be worth it…


And then, they move on and leaving the subject of Maeve, feels too much like leaving light and entering into the darkness of their mutual suffering. Tenebrae will go, he will step into the tight, smothering darkness of his own grief, for, as he watches Morrighan, he knows she has been there too. The way her limbs tremble, he can nearly hear the way her bones knock together, a chattering like teeth in despair. He pretends he does not notice. He is sure the ghosts of his losses are as tall and dominant as hers.


She never loved me.


The monk’s eyes closed, pained. Now he does turn away. Oh, but he is torn by indecision. The need to hold Morrighan, breathe into her skin and say, I know how that hurts. Unrequited love is the most wicked of arrows.


She tells him to find a new purpose and now, now he looks to Caligo and knows his purpose is already decided, by him, by his goddess. To renew his vows to Caligo, it felt like love and in a simultaneous breath like a sentence of punishment. It was. Could he endure it forever? Could he be Sisyphus?


Slowly Tenebrae turns from Caligo. “I think you are right,” he says, to Morrighan, to Caligo. Yet, no matter how hard he tried, the Disciple could not escape the thought that a new purpose in servitude of Caligo felt.. Empty.


The monk takes a breath and turns away from his goddess’ statue. He looks to Morrighan as he smiles a smile that is no smile at all. It is a small, sad, thing. 


“I hope you will find answers after your talk with Caligo, Morr.” Tenebrae murmurs. His shadows shift, concealing him as he turns for the door. They wrap tightly against him, like a cloak, as he steps out and away into the chill winter air.

~ Fin <3 ~










Played by [PM] Posts: N/A — Threads:
Morrighan
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#13

some women fear the fire
some simply become it


Is this what trust felt like? She hadn't trusted anyone for… as long as she can remember. Perhaps Antiope is close to that point, but even then there are some days that Morrighan finds herself questioning. There have just been too many times that she's been let down that it's caused her to expect the worst from others.

But Tenebrae- he's different, genuine. Perhaps, dare she say it, she could consider him a friend. The way that she's already opened up to him and he to her, it's a strange, almost uncomfortable feeling.

Morrighan watches him leave and then waits. It's more to give the man a head start back home before she followed. Although maybe a small part of her is staying so she can have one last moment alone under Caligo. The Regent looks up at the deity's statue again, but there are no words left. It seems she's confessed everything for one day.

She sighs and finally heads home.

"Speaking."
credits


@Tenebrae a short closer <3 thank you for such a lovely thread! I can't wait for their next one









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