Pan had to think long and hard about whether or not he’d found his place here. It wasn’t the same. It wasn’t like Eirhelm, the first place he’d truly felt a belonging. It wasn’t like Neverland, the home he’d loved so long ago – lost – and found again. Here, he felt truly alone. Oliver was gone. Rook was gone. Fantome was gone. Commander Shepard was gone. Even Florentine was gone more than she was here. Perhaps in part, this was because she lived somewhere else… but she had almost always lived somewhere else. Even in the Rift, she’d lived in the Winter Court – the opposite of his Neverland. And yet they’d always found ways to connect for playfulness and mischief. Whether he understood it or not, it wasn’t that his friend was gone in this new land, it was that she was growing up. Soon, she would outgrow the child-stallion, drawn into the world of men and adulthood – like all the rest. Soon, Florentine would drift away from Pan – not because she chose to, but because life would happen around them. And the boy with green scales and a smiling face would be as he always was – a lost boy, never growing up.
These thoughts jumbled in his mind (except for the part about Florentine growing older… for Pan simply refused to think of it), and he sighed quietly as he thought of a way to respond to Coraline. You aren’t a bother… really… friends are never a bother. In truth, having her back was a pleasant distraction. Offering her a lopsided smile, he looked around them at the Dawn Court – his new home – and as he had a hundred times before, swallowed the idea that he would make this place better than it was. He would rise above the loneliness, one way or the other.
Kasil wants me to learn a skill He changed the subject suddenly, focusing on the task at hand. Instead of being bothered by the suggestion that he should be more productive in the herd, Pan took it as a personal quest to find his path. For all of us, really… he’s looking for us to step up and do something – be a sage, or a caretaker, or a warrior… I’m gonna try to be a caretaker. The swamp lady and Kaladin are gonna teach me.
These thoughts jumbled in his mind (except for the part about Florentine growing older… for Pan simply refused to think of it), and he sighed quietly as he thought of a way to respond to Coraline. You aren’t a bother… really… friends are never a bother. In truth, having her back was a pleasant distraction. Offering her a lopsided smile, he looked around them at the Dawn Court – his new home – and as he had a hundred times before, swallowed the idea that he would make this place better than it was. He would rise above the loneliness, one way or the other.
Kasil wants me to learn a skill He changed the subject suddenly, focusing on the task at hand. Instead of being bothered by the suggestion that he should be more productive in the herd, Pan took it as a personal quest to find his path. For all of us, really… he’s looking for us to step up and do something – be a sage, or a caretaker, or a warrior… I’m gonna try to be a caretaker. The swamp lady and Kaladin are gonna teach me.
Pan
Dawn Court
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