A familiar form drifted through the figurative smoke that shrouded her. It was Isra, the very reason for her anguish. No, she was the reason for it. Her inactivity had spurned her self-loathing this time, every time. Noctiilucent would never blame her sovereign for such matters, and yet she still craved the affection and companionship of Isra, while she herself was inadequate. The two had exchanged heartfelt words many days ago, months even. Isra's exclamation of a greeting made her wince internally, but she donned a quiet smile to appease her Queen. The doubt and hateful thoughts spread across her mind like an infection. It was virulent. The anxieties dissipated in the presence of Isra, instead, they shifted to self-criticism. "Isra." Noctiilucent greeted her gently, but her words were loud enough to reach her Sovereign. "It's always a delight to see you. How have you been?" As the words flooded from her ivory kissers the instant regret for them sank into the pit of her stomach. Why won't I ever be good enough? She'd never consider a friendship with the likes of you. The vitriol poured across the intricate webs of anguish in her mind.
What a fine daughter of Xamis she was. Not that it mattered any longer, she was now a Daughter of Denocte. The opposite of her once beloved sun, but the moon could not burn her in the same ways. "Can we get out of here? I've been suffocated by so many bodies these last few hours, I'd like a chance to chat with you if you two are up for it?" Noctiilucent offered to her Sovereign with another quiet smile. The way her mood shifted like the tides made her uneasy these days. Though there was a great shame that permeated her very core for her lack of participation, there was still a part of her that hoped Isra would not lose faith in her. "I'm so sorry I've been absent." Noctii admitted to Isra quickly, not wanting to drag this out in the middle of writhing masses.
The sigh that escaped from Isra's lips had Noctii on edge quite abruptly. Her anxieties flooded through the gates, and nearly spilled out into a dramatic scene. Isra did not seem perturbed, but rather she seemed almost happy. Effortless. She felt captivated by her Sovereign once more, just as she had the first day she had met Isra.
"Speech" Thoughts
"Speech"
Notes: I dunno what's going on rn :') I'm sorry for the awful writing.
Tags: @Isra /Open
And I thought
Maybe we could save ourselves
