[AW] and build me stately castles by candlelight [auditions]

[Samaira]

All the stars we steal from the night sky
Will never be enough, never be enough

Samaira has too many ghosts on her heart, living or not. Too many souls out there, lingering in her own, haunting the empty reaches inside of her. She walks, wherever she goes, with an unusually quiet bonded gliding silently at her side. Days pass—how many days?—and she’s kept to herself in the hospital, tending to her patients, keeping her head down.

Should she have told him about the desires of her heart?

Would it have made a difference?

She enters the courtyard filled with gathered equines and her heart stops when she sees Marisol standing there at the front. The same, it is all the same, and she is not ready for the way it threatens to pull her down and down and down.

Alaunus lands beside her and gently leans his weight against her side. Samaira cannot pull her silver eyes away from a different meeting on a different day and a small part of wonders why she has returned to the court at all. And another part of her knows why, and it is because when she walks the streets small things remind her of him; she is torturing herself.

The earthen pegasus waits until the others have finished speaking and then surprises herself by also raising her voice to be heard. “I am not here to ask to be a part of your regime, Marisol,” she says, and though her voice is respectful it is wavering, ever so slightly, beneath the smoky tones of her accent.

“I am content with my work in the hospital, but I have been under the tutelage of its best doctors, and taking patients on my own for some time now,” Samaira doesn’t even know what she’s asking for until the words are out of her mouth, slipping past her lips on a breath that says I need something else to do, something more. “With your blessing, I’d like to take the role of a Doctor myself, at last.”

She tries not to think of how Asterion had been so pleased with her decision to become a medic. Samaira has too many ghosts on her heart, from this world and the last, and each one has a name that will not leave her be.

What she’s asking for is anything to keep her busy, to keep her away from all these haunted places. What she’s asking for is a distraction.

"Speaking."

credits