It was good he didn’t look right at me for too long. If he did I probably would have ran, stupidly cautious as a doe, not looking back until it was too late to see he never meant me any harm. In hindsight, I was so very trigger shy. But that’s just youth, and I can’t blame myself my softness.
The reflection of ambers danced in the light of his eyes, their lives so short and beautiful I was almost envious. I had always been well aware of the many years ahead of me (in fact it made me sometimes reckless, untouchable, full of the certainty I could be hurt but never killed, not yet) and sometimes the weight of my unlived life, the expectation, the obligation, it all made me feel like I was made of stone.
But I am not made of stone. I am flesh and bone and blood and heart, and sometimes when I find a whim I hold it tight.
I suppose Caspian became a whim of mine, that night. I liked his voice, his accent, the roughness of it like coconut husk rolled down my spine-- but I had absolutely no idea what to do with this liking. If I knew then what I know now, it would have been a very different course of events. But, of course, I didn’t.
“You mean did I come for worries or wishes?” I smiled, finding both equally silly. I didn’t see any reason to travel so far to relieve myself of either-- we had bonfires and ocean in Denocte. In abundance. “I just came to see someplace new. I’ve never been to Terrastella.” There was a contemplative quiet. “It’s not as different as I thought it would be.”
But that was not here nor there, and while heaviness was my default I did not want to weigh down the boy’s delectable lightness. I took a sly step closer. The fire felt warm on my chest. “And you? No wait-- let me guess.” I grinned, emboldened by his hiccups. “You’re here for the wine.” A heavy pause. I had not yet learned to flutter my lashes, so in that span of time I simply looked at him without blinking. “I haven’t had any tonight.” I cast a meaningful glance to his cup. I did not realize I could be manipulative, until I was-- and to my surprise, it came exceedingly easily.
is deeper than all roses
@Caspian
