i'm up against these things i can't see ;
they don't compare ; make me believe, make me believe
T
his panic is setting into me so quickly, it's like I can't breathe. It's suffocating and stealing all the air from my lungs. My heart is beating faster too and my chest feels tight. I just feel so unsure and so scared for this poor bird in pain.There's something about Elena's voice that soothes me. It's similar to how I feel when Momma's calming me down, but it's a little different. I can't really explain it, but I can breathe a little easier again. She tells me it's okay and I believe her (because it needs to be okay, for this hawk's sake). What she says next is true and I guess I never really thought of it that way. Even being a little calmer is making it easier for me to think.
Elena asks me to help her, so I nod. I don't really know what I can do, but maybe I can try if she gives me instructions. She seems really smart and I hope to be like her some day. For now, I guess I'll try to look to see what she wants me to see.
She asks me to describe what I see and what we need to fix, so I take a deep breath and try to focus. It seems clear that it's the hawk's wings, or maybe just one? But since it fell out of the sky, its wings can't work to help him fly. I can see he's bent over strange and can only imagine what kind of pain he must be in. He hasn't bothered to move much since we arrived, almost as if he's too tired to even cry out. My heart feels so heavy for him.
"I think his wing is broken? Something is wrong with them at least," I tell her, then notice something red along the base of one wing. When I look more closely, it's a spot that looks like it was bleeding. "Or maybe it's this? It looks like something attacked him here." I point to the wound with my nose, but then he twitches and makes a quiet disgruntled sound when I get too close. Maybe the feeling of my breath is making it feel worse, so I pull back right away. I instantly feel bad since it hadn't been my intention to do that.
"Can we fix that? Will he fly again?" I ask Elena, desperation in my voice again. I'm trying not to panic, but it's really hard. All I can think about is how he might never fly again and how awful that must feel for such a majestic bird. I really, really hope Elena will know what to do.
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