I
t took me so long to get this far down the streets again. For a while, everything reminded me of her. What once used to be the calming smell of woodsmoke became a bitter reminder of my mistakes. The music I came to enjoy was the same way and I couldn't stay very long to bother watching the dancers. My eyes got so used to looking for her and they still do.But I know she will never come.
There's a small possibility that something happened to her, but I doubt it. She never loved me, or us- she definitely didn't love Maeve enough to stay. I remember the way she looked at me when I told her the news. By the end of it, we were nearly at each others throats. It had been regret, a night gone too far. Maeve and I were her mistake, while she was mine.
Maeve deserves better than that.
I don't really know what compels me to be here now. Maybe in some way I'm trying to desensitize myself so I can stop being a baby about it. I know I can't avoid this part of the markets forever, especially for the sake of keeping an eye on things. Others will likely catch on and know where to hide.
I'm almost relieved to see the Dawn Sovereign because it distracts me from all these thoughts. Although, I'm a bit surprised to see him here. I know he had spent some time here while Raum was destroying the world, but he had since taken the mantle of King over in Delumine. Part of me hopes his arrival doesn't bring some kind of bad news.
"You're far from your meadow of flowers, King," I muse, recalling the very limited knowledge I have on Dawn's scenery. Most of it now is from all that Maeve's told me. Apparently it's mostly pretty flowers and trees. I figure at least her memory of it isn't tainted by Al'Zahra abandoning her. "To what do I owe the pleasure?" I ask, coming to stand by him. I don't know that I've ever spoken to him much before but, for once, conversation doesn't seem too bad right now. Bram brushes my shoulder with his muzzle as if to agree with me.
i've lost a part of me ; tell your friends to sharpen their teeth
