i'm up against these things i can't see ;
they don't compare ; make me believe, make me believe
T
enebrae's smile makes me smile, but also makes me feel a little bit of relief. I didn't think I could do this place justice with what little words I can figure out how to use, but it seems I did a good enough job.I'm happy too that he wants to keep the flower I gave him. Maybe there's a more special one out there, but I've been told a little bit about something called "intuition". It was the first one I saw and wanted to pick, so that must mean something. I don't know if there's a way to preserve it, but hopefully there is so he can keep it for a really long time.
He tells me a little more about how we'd make the crown and it does sound a little complicated. "Wire?" I ask, not entirely sure what that is. I don't know if it's anywhere around here and I crinkle my nose a little. I think I still want to try though so I can look pretty in flowers. He tells me I should just collect flowers first, so I nod but then realize he can't see me nodding. "Okay," I tell him so he knows I understood. Eventually I'll figure that out.
Since I have the yellow tulip from Bram, I decide to keep to colors that go well together. I start to pick more of the warm colors- red, pink… but then I hesitate when I get to the orange. For a moment, I don't see a flower, but a small fire on top of a stem. I think about the embers that sparked at my feet - the ones I created. Not just once, but twice. I'm thankful they didn't last long, but how many more times am I going to come close like that? How quickly could it become a raging wildfire?
I skip the orange flowers and pick some more yellow. My chest feels tight and I sigh. I haven't told anyone yet and I think that's making me feel more crummy. I look at Tenebrae and I know he would understand. I don't think he'd tell Momma either.
"Tenny…" I start to say, using my more recent nickname for him. It's easier to say than his full name at least. "Did you ever not want to have magic? Like when you first got it, did you want to give it back?" I'm hoping my question makes sense. I want to see what he says before I say anything about the fire I might have. I'm hoping he might know a way to get rid of it.
@Tenebrae <3
