[P] pretend I'm burning bright

[Elena]

Elena

let us live like flowers
drenched in sunlight

T

here are things Elena doesn't understand. She does not understand why her father made a deal with the winter devil. She doesn't understand how her mother had gotten sick, how it had taken her. She doesn't understand how Frostbane could kill her father so mercilessly. She doesn't understand how Tenebrae could break her heart. 

The pain was extraordinary.

There are shards of glass buried in her chest, her lungs fill with water and her vision grows hazy. She realizes, that when she left him today, she would not see him again, he would not come back and find her. The next breath is excruciating, but she takes it, fills her lungs with air that did not want to either, the motion desperate and forced. She had been a fool. A fool to think he had wanted her for more than a night; a fool to think she was anything but a placeholder. Her heart had screamed at her in warning—had told her something was amiss and she had ignored it. She had dismissed her better judgment, told herself beautiful lies.

And look where it had gotten her.

She cant go home.

She could.

No, she argues with herself. She cant. 

Something wild raged in her chest, but she turned from it. She felt its wild abandon, the sobs that made her throat raw—the hurt that ached, making her bones throb with its presence. She swallowed it down into her stomach. 

Blue eyes point downwards and she sees er heart lay in a million pieces, thrown amongst the cage within her breast. She didn’t bother trying to put them back together. Love was not in her future and for some reason the gods found her unworthy of it. They had given her Aerwir, but they had forgotten her own passion for life. They had presented her with Tunnel, only to have him nearly kill her. They had offered her Tenebrae and then forced her to watch his heart close away. Love isn’t real. Perhaps it never existed to begin with and everyone was just fooling themselves with a made up emotion that could never be attained.

She watches it on the ground, watches it constrict with the want of her best friend, with the need to bury her head into her crimson mane and forget the rest of the world. She wants to cry to Lilli, to let her ease in the pain in the way that only Lilli can. 

The only way that golden girl will take that heart back is if she can carve out that little cavern in her chest she had placed him in. 

The sky is bleeding with the light of the stars tonight.

Her breath comes out in a puff of white.

It shines like ice crystals in the night. 

The tide begins to roll in, it crawls up her legs like the cold hands of winter, and she remembers another night, on another beach, in another winter, with the The Taiga behind her, her shoulder pressed into the crimson one of her cousin. Funny then, how the water hadn't felt so cold.

code by rallidae
picture by cannon 
@Vercingtorix