azrael
In all his life, Azrael had never known the love of another. He had never felt the catching of breath in his throat while meeting a lover’s stare, or the way his heart could flip and twist at the most fleeting of touches. He hadn’t known what love could do to him – the way it could tear his heart right from his chest, the way heartbreak could turn his days to darkness and his nights to sleeplessness.
Until Elena.
Do you forgive me? It is a question he cannot answer, unsure of whether or not he could. A part of him wanted to forgive and forget, but another part holds back. It is the piece of him which is bruised and hurt by her choosing another. But it wasn’t Tenebrae she turned to now, even with his child at her side. No, tonight, Elena had chosen Azrael. Tonight was all that mattered, he decided, turning into her aching touch against him as his lips descended to her mane, drawing in her scent until he could drown from it. Tonight, she was his, not Tenebrae’s.
The child trembles at his side, and an emotion swamps the star-shed that he had never encountered before. It was some combination of wonder, responsibility, and fear. As if Elena trusted him with the most precious treasure in the world. His eyes are bright as he watches the girl, awash with his glow, absolute trust in her gaze. The moment is perfect, he decides, sighing and expelling the weight of several weeks of hurt with his breath. “Did you tell him?” He questions Elena, remembering their last meeting and his advice to her.
A man had a right to know.
Still too, Azrael questioned his own words now, selfishly wanting to keep the mare and the child to himself, away from the world which might open them to hurt. Here in their dreamscape, Azrael could keep them safe and his – but he knew this dream was far too confining for Elena’s wandering soul and the curiosity of the girl. “The shed stars raise their children together, with no one knowing their mother or their father, only the strength of the People. It is said it takes a village, but still too, I wish I had known a mother’s love and a father’s wisdom. Elliana will.”
His words are as much a promise to Elena as to himself, vowing in that moment to guide Tenebrae’s child as if she were his own. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the way I felt. I should have made sure you knew, Elena. The past is done, so now we can only look forward.” Her golden frame rests easily against him, close enough that he can feel the racing pulse of her heart as it beats in time with his. “No more words unspoken, Elena. I do not want to lose you. For too many nights, I have looked to the stars and seen nothing but emptiness… perhaps they led me here to you tonight, so we might have a second chance to get it right.”
Azrael’s lips hover in her mane, breathing slowly, half afraid the illusion might shatter as he questions. “So what now?”
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