[P] I don't know what you've been told [Ard|Erd]

[Elena]

every day it feels like I’m holding back an ocean

Nothingness; it encased her. She was screaming. ‘Save me, save me,’ she cries, but no one came, no one was coming, and in the deep caverns of her heart, Elena knew it. The darkness was so cold, the kind of cold she only felt when Frostbane had been around. It mocked her, blinded her, chilled her to her soul. Trapped, broken, crying. There was no saving her, and they both knew it. She’s gagging on the ice, it enters her bones, freezes her blood. She cant move. She wishes for the sun, the moon, the stars, any light she could be offered, but she just feels herself plunging further into darkness. Elena never knew it could be this dark in this world. She’s dying. 

Her eyes open then.
Blue and shining. 
She is safe.
The darkness has not won this time. 

A quiet sigh, she unfurls her legs that suddenly feel sore from being stiff with fear. The sun was out, darkness just a faint memory now as the sunshine cascades down in vacant droplets. Elena still doesn't know this land she has decided to live in, a rushed decision, one she hopes is right. Unfamiliar faces pass her and Elena can do little more than smile. Maybe, she shouldn't have left Beqanna after all. She feels old even though her body still hums with youth. Her eyes feel ancient, like she is Ruth looking into the past. The fresh, vibrant image of her dream still clings to her like a bad dream catcher. 

The blonde shuffles off, unsure of here she should go when she has no map to guide her. It is only when she reaches a small patch of water within the field, perhaps collected from melting snow. She looks into it, looks at those eyes, those new eyes of hers, Lilli’s eyes. She can almost see her crimson cousin staring back at her, if she just squints her eyes just right, and turns her head just so. “Lilli, give me strength,” she says and bats those eyes before pulling away. Her heart aches a little more than just before, if it were possible. 

She feels old, heavy. She said it before, but she says it again. 
One more time.
She feels old. 

Elena is a shimmering gold, she wears sunshine and she wears it well, this summer child. She is sad, for now, but it will not be forever. There is still so much happiness in her. The palomino thinks the Dusk Court may be a different home than she ever considered for herself, but Elena is blazing her own, making the future her own, creating paths where there are none. Or, trying at least. She wonders not for the first time when everything in her life seemed to get so complicated. She is still young, and try as she might to keep that heart guarded, Elena has fallen in and out of love more times than she can count. Maybe she would be better off without it. In the end, Elena had ached too much for their touches, the physical contact that she had been neglected with the passing of her parents. Even as Tunnel drug his teeth across her, she leaned to him, wanting him to scar her body. Anything was better than being numb. This she knows all too well. 

It is why Elena so often buries herself in the emotions of others. Anyone’s misery is better than facing your own and that large cavern that threatens to swallow you whole.



* e l e n a
in the dark I’ll pray for the return of the light
the sunflower daughter of benjamin and beylani
medic of dusk.

@Erd @Ard

[Ard]

Run together like birds of a feather
We howl like wild beasts
With all our demons, our hells, our heathens
So let them rest in peace

He hadn’t wanted to go out. Ard had wanted to stay inside, at home, where it was warm and comfortable and he didn’t have to talk to anyone or look at anyone. He woke in a terribly foul mood, fueled by a nightmare he couldn’t remember other than it had ended as all of his nightmares as of late had; Erd had disappeared again.

The nightmares had increased in frequency since his brother’s kidnapping, and even though Erd had returned home and they were reunited and Ard could breathe again, could live again, the terrors of his unconsciousness still pulled and tugged and stabbed whenever they could. He slept less, honestly, spending his hours in the dark sketching by candlelight, painting the visage of his peacefully sleeping brother in their bed, where he belonged.

Oh, how Ard wished for nothing more than to tuck his brother away in his pockets like he did his sketchbook, keeping him safe and sheltered from the world around them.

Erd had recovered nicely from his kidnapping. No marks upon his flesh or his soul, which Ard found himself eternally grateful… But it was he who carried the marks, his paranoia burning like a fire at his heels, the hounds of the damned following his every step.  Oh, he knew his twin was worried, but what could he do when he could not sleep? Lips sealed and words sacredly reserved for only Erd’s ears, he had offered no word of complaint to going out when his brother voiced a morning adventure. They had been cooped up inside for far too long since returning home from Denocte, and Erd wanted to spread his wings.

Ard could deny his brother nothing, and so together the twin warlocks of Luminous, of Novus, had departed their small abode within the capital, cloaks and hoods in place to ward off the bitter cold of the morning. Spring would soon be upon them. The afternoons were becoming warm and the snow beneath their hooves were melting, the days growing longer as spring fought to remove winter’s cruel grasp upon the nation… But not even the warm days could thaw the perpetual, frozen chill that had captured Ard’s heart.

He was terrified that nothing ever would.

Side by side, the twins ventured to the Susurro Fields. Erd’s pace was a joyful prance and Ard listened as his better half prattled on about everything and nothing, from the slush at their feet and the small spring flowers already trying to bloom within dead grasses and moist soil to the rising sun in the sky.

It wasn’t long until they came across another soul out and about, however, a lady of golden hairs and creamy tresses. Ard’s turquoise eyes narrowed into a warning glare as he shifted to stand closer to his brother, pressing himself flush against his twin’s side. He had nothing to say, not to this stranger, even though there was a listless to her that he saw in himself.

"Speaking."

art | bg

[Erd]

The dancing shadows of youth, the colder stars of our truth
The sun that sets on these
To live as runners, we'll know each other
And stand as brothers, we
Could live while we're free

The fresh air around them filled his lungs and Erd moved quickly, his steps a light, confident, happy sashay across the dead grasses and mounds of melting snow within the Susurro Fields.They had been cooped up in their small home within the capital proper for far too long and he was beginning to feel stifled, and so he had asked his brother if they could go out for at least a little while.

Erd knew that Ard wanted nothing more than to stay home. His brother was an antisocial recluse at the best of times, but in the wake of his kidnapping by Manon and being held prisoner in Denocte for so long, Erd really couldn’t fault his brother for being so clingy.

They were one in the same, after all. If it had been Ard at the hands of the enemy, helpless and scared, Erd didn’t really know what he would do. They had lived that cruel lifestyle in Luminous, and to think that such terrible things could befall them here, had befallen them here… It was a hard pill to swallow.

Still, he guided the way through the fields, letting the wind caress their sides and ruffle the ends of their identical cloaks. Tossing his head back to call to his twin, Erd paused, the turquoise of his eyes spotting a stranger meandering amidst the melting snow as well. He didn’t recognize her, the particular sheen of gold and ivory not striking a name or a sense of familiarity within him. Thinking nothing of it, Erd called out to her, a boyish, jovial grin pulling at his dark lips as he pranced a few paces forward, not wanting to get too close just in case their presence wasn’t wanted. “Good morning!”

Ard, Vespera bless him, immediately scrambled after him and pressed himself up against Erd’s side, clearly uneasy about encountering a stranger. Hoping to soothe his twin’s anxiety, the older of the two pressed a chaste kiss to his cheek. “It’s fine, Ard. I promise.”

She wouldn’t hurt them, he was sure of it… And even if he was wrong, Erd knew his brother would slit this woman’s throat before she even had a chance to scream. Not that he wanted it to happen, of course, but, well…

Something had been terribly off with Ard lately, and Erd was more than just a little bit concerned. Maybe later he would go and talk to Theodosia or Marisol about it.

"Speaking."

art | bg

[Elena]

every day it feels like I’m holding back an ocean

She knows this now, she knows it and she hates to admit it. They had been silly, foolish, naive, ignorant, simple children. There, sitting in the grass staring up at the clouds making meaningful shapes from meaningless tufts of white against a cerulean sky. They had thought themselves so untouchable, that danger could never brush its wretched hand against their soft, young, supple skin. Each of them so believed that they were safe within the walls of their valley home. Tragedy, it had already reached each of the girls, and that had to have been enough, in their lives, there had to be no more. They had held hands and whispered secrets in each other’s ears, shared a handshake meant only for the other, daisy chains strewn up in the valley. Nothing could touch them, the orphan girl and the child from a family torn apart by war. They were free.

They had been so wrong, just neither of them had been able to see it.

Blinded by the sound of thundering falls, the smell of fresh pine, and the feeling of grass tickling against their crimson and gold skin. And Elena knows now, how easy it is to slide those rose tinted glasses over eyes, growing blind. She can still be that childhood maiden that saved herself from the vicious dragon, the one who could conquer mountains and tame wild beasts, and soothe aching hearts.

She stands there in gossamer and gold against the backdrop of the fields entirely expecting she would spend the day alone. Though, it was foolish of her to think so. Terrastella may be a large court, but it was a court teeming with life never the less, and therefore, it would not be long until she would be found. This she should have known. Had she learned nothing of Hyaline? Of the legacy family?

This is just about the time that her moment of solitude is over.
Elena embraces it with a compassionate heart.

There is a bright and cheery good morning that Elena is delighted to hear is just for her. Blue eyes turn to the twins and she is flushed with gratitude for the company and friendly (well, one friendly) face they offer. She watches as one twin presses himself close to the other. A behavior Elena had seen in herself and Lilli, always there to protect each other. Elena feels suddenly so defenseless without her crimson cousin beside her.

“Good morning to you two as well,” she says, that old warm confidence easily slips back into her body as that friendly smile graces her lips like a familiar friend. “Glad to see others out and about, despite the winter chill,” she says with a laugh and a blink of those too blue of eyes. “I’m Elena, I’m new,” she says, admits. Her eyes flitter back and forth between the siblings. In the same breath she is reminded of another set of twins, one carefree and jovial, the other moody an dark. But, for the first time in a while, she thinks of family and her stomach doesn't fall to the depths of homesickness.



* e l e n a
in the dark I’ll pray for the return of the light
the sunflower daughter of benjamin and beylani
medic of dusk.

@Ard @Erd