MORRIGHAN vs ISRA
@morrighan - Total: 68/100
OFFENSIVE: Creativity: 16/30, Realism: 23/25
DEFENSIVE: Creativity: 8/15, Realism: 10/15
WRITING: Creativity: 3/5, Realism: 4/5, Mechanics: 4/5
BEGINNING STATS: Exp 16, Health 10, Attack 10
Creativity: originality, imagination, and attention to detail.
Realism: mechanics and whether you accurately reflect your health and attack
Overall writing: creativity, realism, and writing mechanics (spelling, grammar, punctuation, run-on sentences, etc.)
@isra - Total: 81/100
OFFENSIVE: Creativity: 28/30, Realism: 22/25
DEFENSIVE: Creativity: 8/15, Realism: 11/15
WRITING: Creativity: 4/5, Realism: 4/5, Mechanics: 4/5
BEGINNING STATS: Exp 77, Health 40, Attack 40
Creativity: originality, imagination, and attention to detail.
Realism: mechanics and whether you accurately reflect your health and attack
Overall writing: creativity, realism, and writing mechanics (spelling, grammar, punctuation, run-on sentences, etc.)
Closing Remarks: I wanted to apologize for how insanely late this judgement was - after Isra was deactivated it fell off the radar, and then when I learned she would be coming back I held off on the judging again. EXP for this battle will be double, and each participant will be receiving a bonus +500 signos.
OFFENSIVE: Creativity: 16/30, Realism: 23/25
DEFENSIVE: Creativity: 8/15, Realism: 10/15
WRITING: Creativity: 3/5, Realism: 4/5, Mechanics: 4/5
BEGINNING STATS: Exp 16, Health 10, Attack 10
Creativity: originality, imagination, and attention to detail.
Realism: mechanics and whether you accurately reflect your health and attack
Overall writing: creativity, realism, and writing mechanics (spelling, grammar, punctuation, run-on sentences, etc.)
- FIRST POST (intro)
- A good intro post that sets both the tone and setting for the fight. Nothing glaring leapt out at me, it only makes me curious as to how the fight will go.
- SECOND POST
- Defensive: I felt like this part fell a little short - I imagined Morrighan would do more than wince if she felt like she was attacked unfairly? Not a true dodge so I won’t spend time on it, just raised a bit of a question in me.
- Offensive: I wish this was a bit longer; I know it’s a straight forward attack but there’s no flare to it. Since it’s a battle post I’d expect the actual attack to take up a little more time and space. That being said I like Morr’s reasoning in it, and the way you’ve set it up has me hoping to see more magic in the coming posts!
- Mechanics: I feel like the writing is almost there, it’s tough to get into at first but by the end it’s drawing me in, catching my interest - but I feel like it needs an extra push still? It’s good writing and I can’t find much to pick apart without being obsessive, I just wish there was more to draw me in!
- Notes: Ahh this post was so very true to Morrighan’s character. Her being unable to burn the arrow just yet really makes me eager to see how the rest of the fight plays out.
- THIRD POST
- Defensive: N/A.
- Offensive: I love this as an attack; I love that her fire became uncontrollable, that it fed off of her rage. I really don’t have anything negative to say about this.
- Mechanics: Nothing stuck out to me, just a very good post to read!
- Notes: This post drew me in much better; I could feel Morrighan’s frustration and was honestly silently cheering her on. And the slow buildup to the fire really had me hooked and leaning into the post.
- FOURTH AND FIFTH POSTS (closers)
- Combining both of these into one note. I felt these final posts created a very good ending; I really liked seeing Morrighan’s development throughout these, she’s dealing with both the fire and her own thoughts. Considering they have a whole fire to put out still I’m glad it didn’t just end with Morr walking away from it in one post. Overall these both added to the story and were both fun to read through. Good job!
@isra - Total: 81/100
OFFENSIVE: Creativity: 28/30, Realism: 22/25
DEFENSIVE: Creativity: 8/15, Realism: 11/15
WRITING: Creativity: 4/5, Realism: 4/5, Mechanics: 4/5
BEGINNING STATS: Exp 77, Health 40, Attack 40
Creativity: originality, imagination, and attention to detail.
Realism: mechanics and whether you accurately reflect your health and attack
Overall writing: creativity, realism, and writing mechanics (spelling, grammar, punctuation, run-on sentences, etc.)
- FIRST POST
- Defensive: N/A.
- Offensive: I love that this is a training sort of move; it has me wondering how it will lead to a brawl if she’s firing at a distance, but it was definitely one of the most interesting attacks I’ve seen in battles.
- Mechanics: A clear read, nothing superfluous that made me question its purpose, it all played a part in the greater story.
- Notes: The tempo of the post picks up throughout it; it started out a little slow, but by the end I was really getting into it and ready for the fight. I love that this is more of a teaching moment than a spar (which makes sense considering how outmatched they are.)
- SECOND POST
- Defensive: N/A
- Offensive: I really love this. I was expecting israge and fury and destruction — and it’s not any of those things. It’s holding back and teaching and an attack without being a true attack, and it makes sense for her to be relying on her magic and weapons than going head to head with Morr.
- Mechanics: Again a clean read, nothing that really made me pause or slow me down.
- Notes: This is such an unconventional take on a fight, it’s really refreshing actually. I love seeing Isra in this role.
- THIRD POST
- Defensive: I mean how else do you defend yourself against a fire haha. I love her reaction to the flames, a very solid post.
- Offensive: N/A
- Mechanics: A couple odd word choices, a few sentences i had to reread to get the idea behind them. Nothing huge, but it was a little choppier.
- Notes: The post tells a story all on its own (while still fitting into the overall story), but it can stand up on its own and I love it for that.
- FOURTH POST (closer)
- A good closing post, short and to the point. I love that you included both Isra’s thoughts and a bit of Fable’s. I can see how Isra has evolved in this fight and how acting like a mentor has affected her; this post was a neat close to that.
Closing Remarks: I wanted to apologize for how insanely late this judgement was - after Isra was deactivated it fell off the radar, and then when I learned she would be coming back I held off on the judging again. EXP for this battle will be double, and each participant will be receiving a bonus +500 signos.
